Lollipops and Grenades

That seems to what it is today. I have four (soon to be five) tabs open. Three of them are me replying to or creating a roleplay thread. I have two (soon to be three) documents open. All of them are me adapting Sachiko to different sites. *squee* I love this character more than I could possibly put into words. She is so much damn fun!! I normally dislike putting characters on multiple sites (the only exceptions to this rule thus far have been Rio and Sin, Rio because I realized she was more suited to one site than the other, and Sin because I wanted to test him/her out before I put her/him up on Soul. I used to do it with Eve, Rumor and Angel, but that never went well, so I stopped. Which is why I dislike the practice.). But now, it seems, Sachiko will be on all the sites.

I’m adapting her for a Fruits Basket roleplay, where she will perform for Akito and the rest of the Sohmas when she needs to, and also befriend Tohru, because that just comes with the territory. I’m adapting her for a Fullmetal Alchemist site, where she will a chimera. I’m also putting her on Sugar & Spice, where I’m borrowing her power from Obake and allowing her to morph into a wolf. I’m also trying to figure out how to adapt her for when I finally find an Assassin’s Creed forum worth a damn. I may even put her on Jinx Me, if I can figure out how that would even work out, seeing as I already have two gals on there… *strokes imaginary beard* Hmm….

I announced this on SoulxSociety, but there was a total lack of enthusiasm, so I will put it up here, where I don’t expect any enthusiasm at all. XD

So I was feeling kinda lazy and decided that instead of wading through links on SxS to look up the name of Sachiko’s mother, I decided to just Google her name and find her profile from there. Imagine my surprise when I found out she was a real person. I mean, my jaw probably actually hit the damn floor.

It’s not every day you find out that not only does your best and favorite RP character share a name with a real person, but that real person is awesome as shit.  It was a great moment in my life, even with the lack of excitement shared. XD I’m seriously putting research into this woman, just because of this coincidence, and I’m gonna look at the movies she’s been in and listen to the music she does…

…it’s a style called “enka”, which I am totally unfamiliar with. Not for long. >:D Mwuahaha. I’ve already got a tab open in YouTube. I’m on the ball with this. I actually think it’s really cool that I found someone with my character’s exact name, especially when you consider it’s not a terribly common name. That’s why I chose it!

I dunno, I just kind of love this kind of stuff. Every time I see “Murano” on the back of a car, I laugh a little inside.

The cool thing about that, though, (and by “that”, I mean the singing thing) is that in all of her incarnations, Sachiko sings. In the novel I’m writing for her, our darling Chiko-chan was a singer before she was a Shinigami, and even sang while she was in the Academy, probably just to fend off the rumors that she couldn’t speak. And this woman…not only a singer, but apparently, a really fucking great one! Talk about inspirations, man! Read the rest of this entry »

Actually, it’s Michaela, but close enough.

Well, anyway, last post, I said I was gonna play AC in the summer. Well, apparently, “in the summer” means “the next day”, because that’s what I did. XD Despite the warnings given by my brother, I restarted Assassin’s Creed last night. (He actually gave a good argument: “Dude. You’re on the third assassination and you’re bored out of your mind. What makes you think this is gonna be any different?” It was a good argument.) Now, my argument was the winning one, obviously: “I’m doing it because I’m bored.”

With the explanation out of the way, I’m gonna start playing AC right about now. Now, technically, yesterday was “Day 1″, but the hour I play AC also happens to be the hour before I pull my ass to bed, so I’ll have to do these updates the day after. Read the rest of this entry »

During the summer, I’ll actually sit down and dedicate some real time to playing the AC series for real. As it is, I played half of the first one, got infernally bored, and played the first level of the second one. XD I’m kinda lazy like that. But this summer, I think, I’ll play it and blog about it. It’ll be great.

But that’s not what this post is about. This post is about a theory I have that makes far more sense than the explanation I was given.  Now, before you read this, please know that I skimmed through the manual (yes, I got a manual with a used game *lucky bitch*) and I have read the wiki article on this subject, just to make sure I had my facts straight.

The source of my confusion, you see, is synchronization. You can read the article if you so choose, but long story short, doing something your ancestor didn’t do, or not doing something they did do, results in loss of synchronization. That makes sense, of course. But that leads to be a bit of a problem, and that lies of course in combat. Because this game’s “health bar” is actually a synchronization bar, meaning that getting hit in battle results in loss of synchronization.

Because apparently your ancestors never got smacked around. Read the rest of this entry »

Yup, that’s me. *sigh* I really think we should have just…well, I really just think we should have enrolled me next year. Starting in the last semester (and the last half of the last semester, no less…) has been nothing short of a nightmare. I have to take summer school and retake my freshman year, because while I have credits, my counselor and I agree that taking algebra in summer school is dumb.

So I’ve got a total of about a month of summer school spread out over two months, and it’s going to cost an absolutely beautiful $150. :/ This sucks balls. It doesn’t look like it’s gonna be too bad, but I’ve given up most all of my electives next year so I can double up my core classes. Now in addition to all this other crap I’m doing. *sigh* The only thing I’m not gonna have to do double of is English, but that’s only because I’m taking summer school.

Well, summer school really isn’t that bad…I mean, it’s only a few hours a day and only two days a week, but it’s more the fact that I have to do it at all that’s peeving me off. And, in spite of all this crap, I still end up getting four years of high school. I’m basically back at square one, and it really would have been easier just to put me in school at the beginning of next school year…like I said in the first place. Frankly, looking back, I really wish we’d done that. That would have been fine. I’d rather be a sophmore-age freshman than a repeating freshman, frankly. The only thing that gets you dirtier looks around here than saying you’re a freshman is saying you’re a second-time freshman. Also, it’s just really a pain in the next.

Ahh, yes, another thing about summer school. As the name suggests, it will take up most of the godforsaken summer. =.= My planned trip to Florida will have to be somewhere between July 27th and the beginning of school on August 27th. *beats head on the wall*

So. I guess. I think anyone who’s talked to me a lot has probably realized this already, but I think it’s different to get it all out and say it without mincing my words. That, and I feel better about things when I write about them. When I get them out in the open. It’s the difference between letting someone in and baring your soul, I guess. So here I go, baring my soul like an idiot for the entire damn world to see.

But I realized today that what Kira’s been telling me these last few weeks is true. It blew my mind for a few moments, before I realized that of freaking course it was true. But…it really is true. O_O She told me that I was recreating a failed and abusive relationship with people around me in the hopes that I’ll turn it around, that I’ll be able to change it and make them love me. And that’s…that really all comes down to the one confession that really is going to end up summing up most of my actions or words in these next few years…possibly even longer:

I feel unneeded. I feel unnecessary. But even that doesn’t really get to the heart of the matter, I guess. The heart of the matter is, no matter how needed I am or am not, I feel unwanted. I always will, I’m starting to think.

Read the rest of this entry »